Mitch McConnell is made from stars, too

Ain't that a hard truth? And an incredibly challenging part of our work: loving kindess to the worst of people. And he's one of the worst of us, for real. If we don't kindly love him, we are him. If the conversations we have between likeminded people sprial us toward anger and frustration and baffledness at those who are focused on power and white supremacy, if we hate and separate, we perpetuate the very energy we are working to eliminate.

Fiona Apple says it best in her incredible anthem, Relay:

And I see that you keep trying to bait me
And I'd love to get up in your face
But I know if I hate you for hating me
I will have entered the endless race

Our work is hard and can feel small, perhaps ineffective. Incorrect my loves, it's the reason we are here. Loving kindness for one another. For my cynics, I quote a dear friend and ask you: Ok then, what's the alternative?

But as you know, this is a blog about motherhood, so my main question is: How the fuck do you explain this to your child? That an adult can be so cruel. That an authority can want to hurt you, your family, your community. 

Probably not like this

When my son, five at the time, asked why I didn't like Donald Trump, I explained it like this:

Me: Trump is a bad president because he is unkind to people with darker colored skin. For example, if it was raining really hard and a family was stuck outside and Donald Trump was inside in a nice, warm house, he wouldn't let the family come inside and dry off. Isn't that mean? 

Buddy: That's so mean! If it were raining really hard and I was inside, I wouldn't let HIM in!

Me: Actually buddy, we would. Even though we don't like him, we're kind to everyone. If we didn't let him in, we'd be mean, just like him. 

His eyes widened for a moment before he pursed his lips in a frown and nodded. We revisited this topic several times over the next few months, reiterating the message that even when we really don't like people, we are still kind. And after a while it naturally drifted away. But he brought it up last week, a couple years later, and he asked me:

"Mom, would we still let Donald Trump into our house if it was raining?" 

And I said, "Yes, baby. But this time, I'd give him a piece of my mind!" as I shook my fist in the air.

Buddy's response: "And he sure as hell couldn't sleep in my bed!"

And so I ask all of you who are furious with and indignant at our fellow humans' decisions and what appear to be complete lack of hearts and morals to take a moment to send loving kindness to someone you would also like to punch in the face. They will receive your energy, even if they don't recognize it, and you will impact them and all of us. Because we are all made of stars, even fucking Mitch McConnell.

Comments

[Lisa Elliott]

Your are simply the best. I so agree with you, hard to put in to practice, but a great reminder that we all need to reach for the stars and be the better person.

[Lisa Elliott]

Also, so happy you're back at it.