City slickers

Hubs and I talk about all the things we want to do in our awesome city all the time.  We rarely get off our asses to do any of them, though.  It's mega lame.

So when Hubs had the grand idea to take an unheard of free Saturday and go on a hike in Kettle Moraine, I was all for it.  Check one off the giant summer fun list!

We packed a picnic, grabbed the Ergo for Bubs, and I even wore sneakers.  This was serious.  A nice hour drive in which Bubs slept = he's ready to have some F-U-N.  It was great.  Here's me, about 2 minutes into the hike:

Proof of sneakers (and lack of ass)

It was gorgeous, as you can see.  What you can't see but know if you've ever met me, read any word on my blog, or judge people based on appearance (including footwear), is that I'm a city girl.  I've gone on a total of 2 hikes in my life.  Impressive, I know.  The lack of knowledge about hikes really came back to bite me in the end (hint hint).

Get it, get it?

See, in the woods, there's these things called mosquitoes.  Like, a lot of them.  And they're hungry for blood.  Human blood.  MUWAHahahahahahahaha!

We got mother fucking attacked.  Like, big time.  Like out of control, get me the fuck outta here, screw hiking and let's book it, full on WAR.  It sucked so super bad.  Normal people know about the amount of asshole mosquitos in the forest (duh) and wear proper clothing and/or bug spray (duh).  But not us.  So here's the after photo:

A FRACTION of the total bitesOn my thighs alone, I had 19 bites.  Hubs was the same.  Apparently, we're delicious.  The only good news out of this stupid hike is that Bubs didn't get a single bite.  Nice work, Dad!

PS. Thank god we checked that off the list and I never have to go hiking again.  Back to high heels and fancy dinners for me! BOOM!

 PPS. I love me some Billy Crystal, don't I Jenny?  ;)

Comments

[Simone]

Oh man. My dad and I went camping a week ago, and I was wearing capris around camp and forgot to spray them that first night. I had 15+ bites just on my ankles. I feel you!

[Jenny]

You do heart Billy C! And, as Sarah and I like to quote from City Slickers, "I need a vacaaaaaaaation." It's hi-larious, exactly like much of that movie. And reminded me of your last post, needing a vacation from your vacation. Oh, Billy...

PS--any post when we can see your Dean legs (off the map, what?!) is a good one.